Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Why don’t people want the American Dream anymore - marriage, kids, a dog, and the white picket fence?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

K-pop supergroup BTS nears reunion as two more members end military service - The Washington Post

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

What are the most trending skin hydrating products of 2025?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t cotton to rapists

Dollar General Sees Greater-Than-Expected Growth as Higher-Income Consumers Seek Value - PYMNTS.com

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

If you were a writer for HBO, how would you rewrite the final season of Game of Thrones?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I actually pay taxes

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

What would happen if the Soviet Union had simply annexed Manchuria after World War 2 or kept it independent as a puppet state allied them and separate from China as China was too weak too oppose it anyway?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

How should the government address the housing crisis in London that has affected people like 75-year-old Susan Curtis?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t buy bullshit

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

What Happens to Your Blood Pressure When You Eat Grapefruit Every Day? - Verywell Health

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Red Sox’ Roman Anthony already has done something Alex Bregman hasn’t - MassLive

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I can count

Random Eagles notes: Bryce Huff trade perhaps signals some confidence in Azeez Ojulari - PhillyVoice

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

It's time to make friends with your viruses - Salon.com

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

Why do people hate fat people so much, even people who aren't exactly supermodels themselves? It seems like such a deep, passionate hatred, like they're offended by fat people just existing. Fat people didn't do anything to them, so why hate them?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

How will the newly imposed trade tariffs affect the global economy?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

"Unlike Anything We Have Seen Before": Repeating Signal From Deep In Galactic Plane Puzzles Astronomers - IFLScience

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Apple’s Spin on the Personalized Siri Apple Intelligence Reset - Daring Fireball

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have a reading level above third grade

I have complete contempt for traitorism

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I can read

I see through liars

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms